On labelling

So about stereotypes. It’s a bit late (very late…) and I should probably be in bed or something but I felt this deserved a blog post – if only a short one. Stereotypes right now aren’t my favourite thing to discuss because they pretty much inevitably end up triggering an argument, which is odd considering that I am (again) the minority in the place I’m in and get stereotyped a fair bit myself. I’ve not gotten mad about it, though I’ve put on a mock annoyance front a few times. Mostly I laugh it off.
A stereotype is apparently a widely held but fixed and oversimplified image of something. Wiktionary woot! Stereotypes are generalizations and it’s true that every individual wants to be thought of as unique, so I do appreciate that individuality might get left behind, the same way I realize that many stereotypes are negative.
But look. If someone launches a negative stereotype at me I have several choices regarding my reaction. I can either laugh it off, get offended, or let it go now and show how the negative stereotype doesn’t apply to me. I often laugh it off, and if it’s not applicable to me as an individual, I don’t bother to get offended. If it’s an inaccurate generalization, there’s no point getting offended anyway because people who throw that kind of thing around are either not serious about it or just want to get a reaction and if so, they don’t deserve one. Part of the issue I have is, well, why do people take it so seriously? I do realize that stereotypes and labels can be taken to be offensive, but here’s the deal, the way I see it: you decide, when being ‘labelled’ during a conversation, how you want to take it, or how true that label is.
General labels have perhaps at least an iota of truth in them. Let’s examine the controversial gender stereotypes for a start. Example: guys are lazy. We all know guys who are lazy. We all also know that females are equally prone to be lazy (living proof here). However, if I know more guys than girls who are lazy (and I’m not saying I do), chances are I’m more likely to agree that guys are lazy. If a girl has had a string of lousy relationships, she’s more likely to say that guys are jerks, because from her experience, that stereotype holds true. That doesn’t mean that all guys are jerks; only that many of the guys she knows (or has dated) have disappointed her in some way. If a guy says that girls are manipulative, he’s possibly had experiences with females who are exactly that. Women have been said to be materialistic, men to have massive egos, and the list goes on and on and on.
What about positive stereotypes? It’s sort of true that males have in general better navigational skills than women. Guys just pick up on some things faster, like how an engine works, reading maps and that kind of thing. While it may not be true for all males, it’s been scientifically proven that guys can just get some things in a way that women don’t (and vice versa). So why would anyone complain about that positive image? It’s still a stereotype, bear in mind, because it’s widely held, fixed and oversimplified. There are guys who don’t conform to that, and there are women who can do those ‘masculine’ things better than their male counterparts. That deal about women being more sensitive, also: many women are. Some aren’t. It’s a generalization, and it functions how generalizations are supposed to function by giving a rough estimate or guide to begin with, and in every case there will be exceptions.
So let’s suppose this: someone throws a negative stereotype at you in a casual conversation. You could tell them you don’t appreciate that label. You could decide it’s not worth your time losing your temper over and just let it go. What I feel might speak more powerfully and completely drive the point home, is that you can show them how inaccurate it really is. Go ahead and for that person, be their first exception.